My mind said ‘just do something to help. It will make you feel hopeful and emotionally better.’ So when we got the invitation to celebrate our friend’s 60th birthday by volunteering at Heart to Heart International packing Personal Hygiene Kits, I knew I found the something to do!
Heart to Heart is a Lenexa, Kansas, is a non-profit founded by a medical doctor in 1992 to provide medical supply airlifts and medical personnel to countries throughout the world facing disaster. It has sent help to over 100 countries, including Haiti, Vietnam, Liberia, Russia, India and more. In the USA it helps during hurricane and other disaster relief, supplying medical teams and supplies.
Heart to Heart personnel realized that during a disaster people needed personal hygiene supplies. The Personal Hygiene Kits (PHK) were developed, providing toothpaste. toothbrush, soap, shampoo and other items. Millions have been distributed globally.
I have known about Heart to Heart for years, but I have never participated in their volunteer activities, nor had I been to the main headquarters in Lenexa. That changed this past weekend.
Besides wanting to support our friend for his birthday, I must also say that I was drawn to this opportunity because Heart to Heart has been helping victims on both sides of the Gaza conflict by providing hygiene bags and medical aid to Israelis who have been displaced, as well as providing supplies to the victims of the war Hamas started in Gaza.
Not all charities have been even handed in their help, ignoring the suffering of Israelis. Supporting Heart to Heart makes sense. Everyone who faces a crisis throughout the world needs support. Heart to Heart’s mission does not discriminate.
Our two-hour stint was delightful. At first, we were assigned jobs to get the supplies ready. I wrote information on to the PHK bags, while my husband had the opportunity to fold towels. This gave him much joy, because he has been saying for years that when he retires as a doctor (with over 40 years of practice), he wants to fold towels at the gym. I told him that he now has job experience to put on his application: one hour of towel folding at Heart to Heart.
We then joined the other 22 volunteers to start packing the hygiene kits. Our job was to put the packed items into a larger draw-string bag for distribution. Our partners then put these in groups of 15 into a packing box to be shipped where needed.
While we packed there was lively music played to keep us moving. At times I could not help but dance as we packed or waited for more supplies. All the time we were chatting with the other volunteers around us and enjoying the upbeat atmosphere.
When we completed our two-hours shift, we gathered together for a group photo with the birthday boy and his wife. The Heart tto Heart staff told us that we had packed 1250 Personal Hygiene Kits. Somewhere in the world, someone in need will get a towel my husband folded and a bag with my handwriting when they are most in need, as well as one that we packed. That thought makes me feel better!
My mind was right, going to celebrate this birthday by volunteering at Heart to Heart International did help me. I want to get a group together to do it again!
As I have written before, I love museums. So for the last few years, my husband and I have discovered new places on field trips close to home to visit. The last two years, we have spent our anniversary day seeking new places to see. (See blogs below.). This year I focused on two sites in Olathe, Kansas.
School for the Deaf
First stop, Museum of Deaf History, Arts and Culture, A Deafhood Institute. I became intrigued by the site and the museum when I served on jury duty at the courthouse in Olathe. Each morning and afternoon I would drive passed the Kansas School For the Deaf. and think that we should visit it. There is a personal connection as my husband is a member of the hearing impaired community and has needed hearing aids for the past six years My interest piqued when the school I worked at added sign language to the curriculum and I met two people who taught there.
The school was established in 1861 as the Kansas Deaf-Mute Institute. Its’ name changed over the years, using words we no longer use to describe it. It received its’ current name in the early 1900s. The school serves Kansas children starting at age 3 and continuing through age 21. Its mission is: “To ensure that all students we serve achieve their full potential in a language-rich environment.”
The Museum of Deaf History, Arts & Culture was founded in 1988, with the museum building opening across the street from the school’s campus in 2001 and getting its name officially in 2017.
I was intrigued to see the changes in how the deaf community has been treated over the years and the rise of abundant social, cultural and educational opportunities. Learning how sign language came to the United States through a French educator and how that changed the lives of many deaf people to me was important to know.
For me the most interesting was watching a 17-minute documentary about the deaf community of Martha’s Vineyard. This island had a larger than normal population of deaf people. A large percentage of the population of the island used sign language and spoken English to communicate. Offically called Martha’s Vineyard Sign Language (MVSL), it was used until the 1950s. With the development of American Sign Language, this local sign language slowly disappeared. However, some of the signs in American Sign Language come from MVLS.
Also known as the William J. Marra Musuem, the museum is opened Wednesday through Sunday from 10:00 am to 4:00 pm. It is free, but there is a donation box at the entrance.
About a mile from this museum was our next stop, The Mahaffie StageCoach & Farm Historic Site. I had been there almost 40 years ago when I worked for the local Girl Scout Council for a large scout event. I remember it as a small site with the main limestone house that was built by the Mahaffie family on land that bordered the Santa Fe Trail and ended being used as resting stop for travelers both on wagon trains or stagecoach.
The house was built in 1865 by Beatty and Lucinda Mahaffie as a home for their family of eight children, it is one of the last remaining stagecoach stops left! Their farm was one of the most successful farms in the area. And even though the trains brought the end of the wagon trains, this farm survived!
Now operated by the City of Olathe Parks and Recreation Department, it is a much larger restored site than I remembered. There is now a large Agricultural Heritage Barn and the Heritage Center to explore that has exhibits and information about the family and life in the 1800s.
When we went on a Friday afternoon, the main house was closed. However, we were able to explore the Heritage Center and walk around the grounds of the farm and the buildings. During this time of year, the house is only open on Saturdays. But between Memorial Day and Labor Day it is open from Wednesday through Sunday and has living history activities, which are also available on weekends in April, May, September and October. Cost is $3.00 a person.
Since April, I have been telling my husband that I wanted to go to Tulsa, Oklahoma, and visit the Bob Dylan and Woody Guthrie museums. I had the trip planned for the longest time. Our first stop would be these two museums, then we would visit with friends of his and perhaps one of his cousins in Oklahoma. On the way back I wanted to stop in Wichita, see more cousins, spend the night, then on the way home visit the Cosmosphere in Hutchinson, Kansas.
Though I kept talking about it, we never got around to do it this summer. But this fall, our plans changed quickly and radically. We were supposed to go to Israel where our daughter and her husband live. The war changed our plans, but my husband still had two weeks of vacation. I had to do something. Just sitting home and moping and worrying was not an option. I am the type of person who can usually find the good in any situation. And I was determined to find some small element of good.
Road Trip Number 1!
We reached out to our people; I made hotel reservations; and off we went.
The hotel we stayed at in downtown Tulsa was in easy walking to the two archive/museums. They are next door to each other. On our walk towards the museums, we saw a large post indicating that we were entering the Historic Greenwood District. This is the area where once a thriving Black community settled before the 1921 Tulsa Race Massacre took place. We thought it was extremely apropos that the museums dedicated to these two musical activists were in this area. It just fit.
I loved both museums. They each traced the lives of two of my musical heroes. Even though their music was written decades apart, they actually knew each other. One was born Jewish, the other was married to a Jewish woman and fought in WW2. Among Guthrie’s papers is one that reads, “Beat Hitler quick.” That resonated with me with all the Jew Hatred going on right now. The museums are both well worth the visit. You can spend time watching the videos or just walk through. I loved reading about them, listening to their music, and looking at their artifacts. At the Guthrie Museum, you must try the virtual reality of the dust storms that devastated Oklahoma. WOW.
That evening we ate dinner with our friends. I asked about the two museums I wanted to see. The husband actually serves on the board of the Sherwin Miller Museum of Jewish Art. At dinner he told us a bit about the museum, I realized it was much bigger than I anticipated. For a community of about 1800 Jewish residents, it was really special.
The section about the Holocaust was difficult as such museums always have to be. But I loved how they imagined KrystalNacht. I was so touched by the stone display that is a memorial to the 1.5 million Jewish children killed. I had tears in my eyes thinking about the children who were recently murdered by Hamas. How could I not compare the two? The death of every child takes a toll on society.
Upstairs was dedicated to modern Jewish Life. They had a sanctuary set up that must be wonderful to teach about Judaism to those who come to visit. For me, personally, I loved the special exhibit of mezuzahs, the scrolls we put on our doorposts.
From there we went to the Philbrook Museum of Art. The house was built by Waite Phillips, who started a ‘little’ oil company. Phillips and his family lived there for only 11 years, and then they gifted the house and 23 acres of land to Tulsa for an art museum. Okay, I will be honest with you, the art in the house is great. But the house itself is amazing. I love old houses. And this one does not disappoint. The grounds are also stunning. Well worth a couple of hours to walk through and visit. It just cheered me up. I could see myself sitting outside for hours. We especially loved all the wonderful milkweed and butterfly gardens.
After we got back to our hotel, my husband’s cousin drove in from Oklahoma City to visit us. She surprised me with a gift, her grandmother’s mah jong set. She told me that no one in her family plays and she knew that I did, so she gave it to me. Her grandmother and my husband’s mother were sisters. I have to say having both of their mah jong sets gives me joy. It was great catching up with her and seeing pictures of her family and sharing photos of our family.
The next morning it was on to Wichita. One note about the drive from Texas to Kansas. It is VERY flat and dusty. There were no crops really, just fields and fields of red dirt. However, and I am really sorry I could not get a photo of this, besides the oil well arms pumping away there were also giant windmills. And at one spot there was a windmill farm circulating air and making e;ectricity above the same field where the oil well arms were pumping oil. It would have been a great photo representing the changes coming to society as we switch to rely on renewable energy.
Of course I contacted our Wichita cousins as soon as we arrived and then spent the next seven hours with them. It was great. We had two meals with everyone. But also had time for us older adults to just visit. We have not seen them for about six years, which is ridiculous. Wichita is just three hours from home. I vowed that we would come back more often. We need to see his first cousins and also visit some museums. (My husband hates museums, but he loves me.)
Next morning on to Hutchinson and the Cosmosphere, one of my favorite museums in Kansas. Honestly, we went several times when our children were younger. In fact, our daughter attended two summers of Space Camp there and loved them. Even though we have been members for about 28 years, we have not been there for about 20 years. It was definitely time to go back and see the changes!
The museum exhibits are wonderful. If you love space and NASA, you will love this museum. The real Apollo 13 space craft is there. All the exhibits have been redesigned since our last trip. Definitely for the better. We watched one of the two movies, about the Blue Whales. That cheered us up. We were pretty sure that this documentary would end on a sad note, but NO, the Blue whales are coming back and increasing in numbers. Honestly, I think Star Trek’s movie has something to do with that. It was a good start to the visit.
While we were walking around, I noticed a little exhibit off to the side, The V-2 Gallery, which was all about the V-1 and V-2 rockets that the Nazis used to bomb and terrorize London. In the past the history of these rockets was sort of not mentioned. Just as it was not always advertised that Wernher von Braun, who helped start the United States aerospace industry, was a member of the SS and helped Nazis build their death rockets. This exhibit made it very clear. It also made clear that the rockets were built by slave laborers in concentration camps. And over 500 prisoners were killed when the Allies bombed the factory, as the prisoners were locked in and could not escape. These rockets decimated London causing the deaths of over 20,000 people. A sad start to the aerospace history. But one I think should not be forgotten.
Our first Fall Road Trip was a great adventure. We loved seeing friends and family. We loved visiting new museums and revisiting the Cosmosphere. Personally, in this time of great stress for the Jewish community of the world and the horrors of war, I was glad to get away. But at the same time, I am glad that we were able to visit places that show good in the world and how society can survive war and hatred.
I am a firm believer in the words of wisdom from Mr. Fred Rogers. One of his gems was in times of stress or danger, “look for the helpers.” I have to say that in the last four days, the helpers have been finding me. I did not realize how many helpers there are surrounding me.
Since Saturday, October 7, when the Hamas terrorists attacked Israel and murdered almost 1000 people who were just going about their days and celebrating the Jewish holiday of Shemini Atzeret, I have felt the support of my community.
I have received over 100 text messages, emails, phone calls, and Facebook messages from people, family and friends, living all over the country and Israel. I have heard from friends I have not heard from in several years who want to check in on me. Why me? Because my daughter and her husband live in Israel. And everyone wants to know if they are safe.
My neighbors have called and left me messages. A family member who was traveling overseas, emailed me upon landing in Hungary when she heard about the attacks. My college roommate and high school friends are contacting me. My community in Kansas have reached out. And it is not just me. My husband has received messages and support from his work colleagues and friends.
Our world is so small now. What happens in one community, one country can impact every country. The violence of terrorist has been a bane to many countries: New York, Washington DC and Pennsylvania, USA, Mumbai, India, Paris, France; Buenes Aires, Argentina; and more. The need for security from terrorists/shooters is overwhelming simple things like entering a building, going to school, going to pray.
In most cases the active shooter or the terrorist is easily seen as the one doing evil. It is somewhat disheartening to see on social media and in the news that there are people who are praising the barbaric slaughter of children, women, men, families in their homes, elderly. Many of whom were just at home enjoying a holiday. But not only were they killed but their corpses were mutilated. And many were taken hostage and brutalized and humiliated and hurt. Hamas has shown its true face of evil.
To those who feel that Israel is at fault for this attack, I have to say how would you react if a group of terrorists came over from Mexico and killed 1000 people in El Paso, Texas, and said the USA deserved it because they are treating the South American refugees badly. Would you say the USA deserved once again to be the victim of terrorism? I think not. The citizens of the USA would want revenge, just as we did after 911. It is a war crime to actually target children and non military personal.
According to the United Nations: “The right of civilians not to be arbitrarily deprived of life and the prohibitions against killing or maiming civilians are principles firmly enshrined in international humanitarian law, international human rights law and international jurisprudence. The prohibition of violence to civilians, including children, in particular murder, mutilation, cruel treatment and torture is a principle of customary international law, with universal applicability in all situations of armed conflict.” (See website below.)
I would think that taking children and infants hostage; murdering over 260 teenagers at a party, and murdering families in their homes would be considered a crime against humanity, targeting women, children, civilians is not acceptable in International law. And yes, Israel is now bombing Gaza, and innocents will be killed. And that hurts as well. But as we well know by now that Hamas uses civilians as human shields. Another crime against humanity that must be credited to the evil of Hamas.
Which brings me to another Mr. Rogers quote:
“We live in a world in which we need to share responsibility. It’s easy to say ‘It’s not my child, not my community, not my world, not my problem.’ Then there are those who see the need and respond. I consider those people my heroes.”
When a terrorist attack occurs anywhere in the world, no matter the country, we as the world community need to come together and be the helpers and say this is wrong. We need to help. It is our problem. These attacks do not happen without financial support. The world is aware of where the money comes from to kill. I believe it was due to the process of creating an agreement between Saudi Arabia and Israel that this attacks happened. Hamas and its ally would lose some control if that agreement had occurred.
I know there are those working for peace in the Middle East. I thank them.
For me, I say thank you to all those who have reached out to give me moral support and love during this time of great distress and anxiety for Israel, all of her citizens, my daughter and her husband, my extended family and friends and also for the Palestinian people who are not members of Hamas and who are also suffering due to the terrorists’ unconscionable acts.
May the names and memories of all have been killed be a blessing. May the goodness of the helpers be remembered. I end with one last Mr. Rogers’ quote:
Sometimes serendipity does not go the way you want it to go!
Over 20 years ago, a woman called our home and left a message. My husband’s father had passed away, and the obituary mentioned his mother’s name as well. She had died 20 years before at the young age of 59 from cancer. The caller said that she had grown up with my mother-in-law in Leavenworth, Kansas, and really wanted to speak to my husband about his Mom.
My father-in- law died on September 1, 2001. Ten days later was 9/11. The message got deleted and forgotten for quite a while. Life seemed so bizarre in the days and months following the terrorist attack. With most of my family in the New York City area, I was suffering with the rest of the country in a state of shock. My father-in-law’s death faded into the background. But we were feeling the emotions of that loss as well as the loss of security we all felt in the USA.
Sometime after the initial phone call, I remembered the call. I told my husband that someone named Marjorie had called about his Mom. I no longer had the phone number or the message. But I knew that somewhere in our Kansas City Jewish community this person existed. And then it faded away again. But every once in a while, if I met an older woman named Marjorie I would ask if she grew up in Leavenworth.
A month ago a friend’s mother passed away. Although I am friends with this woman, I did not know her mother. I never met her. I never spoke to her. But I wish I did because in her obituary, I found out her name was Marjorie and that she grew up in Leavenworth, Kansas. Furthermore, she and my mother-in-law were born just six weeks apart. It had to be the missing Marjorie who had called us so many years before. She had lived to the amazing age of 97. Almost 40 years longer than my mother-in-law.
I could not go to the shiva or funeral, but I emailed my friend and apology and told her the story of my mother-in-law and this woman who I now believed was her mother. She immediately wrote back that she had a box of memorabilia from her Mom and that she would look through it. I know it gave her something to do, an escape from the funeral activities. It was a search for answers. Was her Mom my mother-in-law’s friend?
The answers came quickly. My friend emailed me a page from the Leavenworth High School yearbook. They were in the same grade. Then articles from local newspapers showing both of their names. There was not much we could do then, as I was leaving town.
I told her that I would take her to lunch when I came back because I could not go to shiva. And she agreed to bring some of the papers. What a lunch. I saw my mother in law’s high school graduation program. I saw the program from her confirmation at the Leavenworth synagogue. Four girls were confirmed together. My mother-in-law, my friend’s mother and her sister, as well as one other girl. My friend told me that somewhere she has a photo from the confirmation. I cannot wait to see it. She was excited as well because now she can put a name on each of the girls.
I found out that sometimes my mother-in-law used a different spelling for her name. Sometimes it was Leona May, which is what we all believed was the spelling. And sometimes it was Leona Mae. Did she use that when she wanted to be a bit more fancy? Who knows. But I found it endearing. Legally it was Leona May.
I found out in 1993 the class held their 50 high school reunion. Of course, she was not there since she had died in 1984. But her sister, Barbara, submitted a biography about what she did after high school, her family and of her death from cancer. It was somewhat emotional to see this message from Barbara.
I so wish I had found Marjorie years ago. I wish we could have gone through her box of memories together with her daughters and my husband. But I am still glad I have finally found out who she was in the community. Also that my friend and I can enjoy this link between our families.
I retired. I planned it since Thanksgiving weekend 2022. I knew that at the end of the school year, I would be completing my almost 13 years as the fund development and public relations director for the the Accelerated Schools of Overland Park. I loved my job. I loved the people I worked with, the children we helped and the work I actually did. When I turned in my keys and walked to my car, I had little tears and a feeling of melancholy. I knew I was doing the right thing. I was ready. But a part of me was sad. I had so much joy in my job! Including my final field trip in April. But first…
There were things I loved about my job. I liked the part of the job that had to do with fundraising and PR. That was what I was trained to do. But what I had fun doing was all the extra stuff. For years I planned the graduation and awards ceremonies. I worked with the hotels or event sites and planned parties. Originally, I also planned all the staff parties and got the food and set them up. During the past few years several teachers took that over.
For a long time, I scheduled speakers and kept schedules for the field trips. The teachers planned these, but I would come up with some ideas and help out when needed. Which was great for me, it gave me a reason to go to more museums. And I love museums. The speakers were really my main job. We had parents sometimes, or just people I knew. Veternarians, doctors, financial planners, artists, as well as speakers from different organizations like Metropolitan Organization to Combat Sexual Assault (MOCSA) and Midwest Center Holocaust Education (MCHE). Once a parent who was involved in Water.Org came. That was great.
But what I really loved were the community service projects I got to arrange. I arranged for recycling at the school. I had someone from Johnson County government come to speak to the students and staff about recycling. Then I was able to arrange for a non profit, L’Arche Heartland, that has a sheltered workshop. They collect recycling from some offices as a job for their clients. It was a perfect match, our school that caters to students who are different and thrive better in our school. And the recycling collected by special needs adults. I loved that I was able to arrange that.
For several years before and after COVID we collected food for Harvesters. In my early years we even had our older students go to Harvesters once a year and help at the warehouse. Of course that stopped with COVID.
The last community service was one of my favorites. I made contact with the Veteran’s Community Project (VCP) for our school to help them this year. The wonderful Kristin Griffin, a VCP staff member, came to speak to our students. The student council had decided to up our collections and collected almost 250 pairs of socks before the talk in January 2023. So when Kirsten came to talk, we gave her the socks. Later in the year, during the month of February we collected hygiene products for the VCP.
After Spring Break, the student council advisor, the three members of the student council and I went to the VCP campus to meet with Kristin and to tour it. I was so excited. I had been watching the creation of this village since it started. The idea of providing tiny homes for homeless veterans just touched my heart. And to actually get to tour it and see it in person and to learn more about it was wonderful. We got to go inside one of the tiny homes. We saw the ‘store’ area where any homeless veteran can come to get supplies. We learned about how they help all veterans.
I loved that in the Less Thompson Building there is a communal kitchen where residents learn to cook. Also offices for a doctor, dentist and veternerian to help with medical issues both human and companions. Social workers are on staff as well to help the veterans deal with other issues. The hope is that these veterans can transition to other homes and find jobs. There was so much more to see and learn about. What a wonderful idea that was conceived by veterans wanting to help other veterans. They were truly wonderful in their ambitions.
The Kansas City campus of VCP has started a nationwide trend. There are now VCP villages planned in six other cities with the national headquarters are here in KC. I read Jason Kander’s book, Invisible Storm, and was glad to know that someone who really understood the plight of veterans is now the CEO of VCP. We did not tour the national offices, but we could see the building across the street.
I was so impressed and so pleased to be able to go with the students on my last ever field trip to the Veteran’s Community Project. It was a real moment of joy for my last year at the school.
Over the Fourth of July holiday, a friend of mine called to tell me she had to come over and share something she found. She told me that I wrote something that related to what was happening in the world today, and she almost could not believe how right I was in my premonition.
What was the find? A copy of a column I had written 22 years ago. Entitled, “Election affects future of Supreme Court,” the column was in the October 21, 2000, issue of the Kansas City Star’s Blue Valley/Leawood Neighborhood News. This was a publication that was inserted into the KC Star in our area for many years.
I wrote a commentary column for the Neighborhood News for about nine years. In this publication was my column about voting and the Supreme Court. I remembered writing it, but honestly did not remember what it said. However, once I reread it, I agreed with her. In it I wrote about the importance of presidential elections and not to worry about too much about the short term goals because it was the long term goals that could hurt society the most. Mainly that the biggest issue to vote for was who would be choosing our Supreme Court justices.
I tried to find a link to the original column online, but could not find it. Instead, I am putting a picture of the column here.
To be honest, I wish that my fears did not come true and that people had paid attention to elections. Those who stayed silent by not voting; those who were complacent thinking nothing would change; those who did not vote because they did not like any candidates, or not enough to vote for one; your silence led to this.
Don’t stay silent any more. We all have to vote. Now the biggest vote we face in Kansas is the Amendment to ban Abortion. VOTE NO. Kansas already has strict abortion guidelines. The antiabortion groups are trying to ban all abortion here as well. No abortion for rape or incest. No abortion for health. No abortion period. And along with that they almost always want to sideline birth control.
We cannot be silent or stay home. This is too important to women’s health and privacy.
I recently finished four days with 12 total strangers. We were chosen to serve on a jury panel for a civil case involving wrongful death in a nursing home. We, the twelve jurors and one alternative, were instructed that when we were in the room together, or outside, or anywhere, we could not speak about the case at all until deliberations. We were not to go online to look up any information about the case. We could only rely on our own knowledge and background. We could not speak to anyone involved on the other side even to say hello. These were the rules we had to follow.
To be honest, I could not believe that I would be selected. I answered everything honestly. Yes I volunteered in an elder care facility. Yes I was a spiritual care volunteer. Yes, I have helped someone in hospice. Yes I had a medical professional in my family, my husband is a physician. Each time I was sure that was it. I would be struck from the jury. Another man, who actually worked as a social worker in nursing homes and knew this particular facility, was also seated on the jury. Before it started, I turned to him, as we were seated next to each other, and said, I cannot believe that they kept you. But they kept both of us.
The first day in the jury room, we each found a seat around a table with just 13 chairs. That became our seat for the duration of the trial. We had to line up in numerical order each time we left the jury room and went into the courtroom. It was just like on television. Everyone in the court would be standing and waiting for us to reach our seats. Then the announcement that we could now be seated.
Next to me in the jury room sat Juror 9. She and I discovered that we both enjoyed playing Wordle and Quordle. It gave us something we could talk about, our conversation each day was about how we were doing with these and other word games. It helped.
Two men, Juror 2 and the one eventually elected our Foreman, also played Wordle. Our conversation grew to include them each morning. They had never played Quordle. To help them out, I told them where to find Quordle and little about how it was played. Juror 9 chimed in that you can solve them in any order. Which I had not known…. But now I do.
The four of us spent our morning breaks finishing our Wordles and Quordles. It was a great way to spend time and to talk about something that was allowed. Others stayed silent, snacked, read, and just waited.
On the third day, when the Foreman turned to me and said, “The Best part of doing jury duty was finding out about Quordle,” I felt a feeling of satisfaction. We were bonding over the game.
But to be honest, we did not bond enough. The three of them voted differently than I did. We only needed 10 votes to decide. Ten voted for the defense, two of us for the plaintiff.
In my mind, I believe they were wrong. But then they did not have my particular knowledge about elder care facilities and doctors. It was sad for me because I believe every person has the right to die with dignity. No one, even someone with dementia who is going to die, should die soon after several falls leading to a broken arm, a concussion, and stitches while in the care of a nursing home. The images we saw and the information I learned truly haunts me.
After the trial, the judge came back to speak to us. He told us that the family was gone, but the lawyers wanted to know why we voted as we did. He said it was important learning experience. Nine of us went. The other yes vote and I sat together.
First they allowed us to ask them questions. As the information came forth, I could see that others who voted No, were beginning to see what the other juror and I saw. For example, one juror voted No because the plaintiffs attorney did not show that the nursing home had a history of negligence. I had said they can’t do that. He asked the plaintiff’s attorney if there was other negligence and if yes, why hadn’t he told us.. The lawyer’s answer, there were 59 pages of citations, but he was not allowed to enter them. That juror’s face fell.
Then the lawyers could ask us questions. The defense attorney turned to me and said, “YOU, YOU voted yes. I knew I should have struck you from the jury.” I agreed with him, yes he should have struck me. Then I gave him my five reasons for believing that it was wrongful death and malpractice. I said, this is how I saw it, the majority did not. But I did what I could.
However, no matter how disappointed I was with the outcome, I did my duty as a juror, and it is time to move on. For me it was four days that I will not easily forget. I can at least feel good about the word games.
Twenty years ago my husband became obsessed with climate change and over population. He was concerned that the world would not be able to survive as water resources would be depleted and the world suffered through the impact caused by the changing climate. He started talking about the need to use the sun for energy and stop the use of fossil fuels. His focus was on solar panels and electric cars.
For his midlife crisis, he acted! Fifteen years ago, we ordered solar panels for our home. We became the first home in Johnson County, Kansas, to retrofit a private home to solar energy. It was quite an experience. We found a company to assess our home for the panels. A friend of ours worked at Black and Veatch, an engineering firm. She took the proposal to work, where several engineers reviewed it and made some suggestions. In the end we decided to put up ten solar panels, as well as add eight back up batteries.
It took a while to get everything ready. Permits were needed. The panels and batteries had to be ordered. The roof needed to be reinforced. The city inspector was at our home several times, climbing into the attic and checking the wiring through the house. She was quite excited to be part of this retrofit. Eventually the new rafters in the roof were approved; the electrical wiring was approved; the panels were put on the roof; and after months of anticipation the solar panels came online! It was exciting. Our neighbors came out to see the panels as well.
Solar panels on our home November 2006!
We had some issues at first with the electric company, KCP&L. Even though there had been some contact with them about the solar panels, it had not gone to the right people. We kept having KCP&L service people come out to check our meter, as it was going backwards. We were accused of turning it upside down! Who does that? People who do not want to pay, we were told. I kept showing them the solar panels and trying to figure out who we needed to talk to at KCP&L. Finally, a woman repair person arrived to once again accuse us of moving our meter. I took her to the back yard where she could see the solar panels on the roof. She had the aha moment and understood the issue. She promised to look into it.
KCP&L at our home to see the two meters installed. All the KCP&L cars and trucks by our home. And the PR person taking a photo of our panels.
Meanwhile, we wrote to our state senator, John Vratil, who was a great help. Through him, we got in touch with Dave Wagner at KCP&L. From there on the process got easier. Finally in August 2007, resolution of the issue occurred. First KCP&L installed two different meters on our house. One for incoming electricity and one for outgoing. On the day these two meters were put in, we had about 11 KCP&L staff coming out to help and watch the installation. They also put a special shut off level on the house and a commercial surge protector. It was really exciting for my husband and I, and for KCP&L.
Dave Wagner was one of the people who came out for the event, as well as a young woman from their media department. She took lots of photos, as did I, to document the occasion. My husband took several of the KCP&L personnel into our basement so that they could see the backup batteries! We explained that not only were our electric bills cheaper due to the solar energy, but also due to the panels capturing the ambient heat and keeping the house cooler.
We were actually highlighted in KCPL’s newsletter and were on the news…rather our house was in the newsletter and on the news. Eventually KCPL developed one meter that could track both in and out electricity, known as net metering.
For 14 years we lived happily in our house. When the power went out, we had electricity for eight important elements, including the refrigerator, the furnace fan, and lights in several rooms. During the spring, summer and fall, we saved at least $100 a month in electric bills. And during the brutally hot months of summer, even more!
Two years ago, we decided to downsize from our home of 35 years and move into smaller reverse two story villa. The one thing we did not count on was the HOA refusing to allow us to have solar panels, even with a rolling black out in the winter of 2021. There was a HOA meeting where the topic came up. Among the negative comments included that solar panels were ugly. Not so. They also did not know anything about the new technology. Supposedly there was to be a committee formed to discuss solar panels. Not…. The former president of our HOA, who has moved away, told us the only way we would get solar panels was to have the city or the county or the state removed that restriction from HOAs.
When we first moved to Johnson County in 1985, many HOAs demanded that all homes had to have wood roofs! What a joke. Each Fourth of July, and whenever there was a thunderstorm, some homes had roof fires. Around 1999 this clause eliminated from many homes associations due to Overland Park passing Ordinance No. BC-2167 which prohibited the enforcement on covenants which prevented homeowners from putting on composite shingle roofs! The community, and I believe the insurance companies, help make this change. Now very few homes still have wood roofs!
Johnson County’s ban on smoking in businesses and most public places were enacted on January 2, 2008. My husband, a pediatric allergist, was one of the people who testified at a commissioners’ meeting asking to enforce a ban on smoking. In March 2010, then Kansas Governor Mark Parkinson signed a law forbidding smoking in Kansas restaurants.
When the community came together, action occurred once again. We now can eat smoke free in any restaurant!
If citizens could make a change with these two issues: public smoking and wood shingle roofs, I am hoping that we can do it again. I encourage everyone who lives in Johnson County to write to the Johnson County Commissioners as well as their Kansas State Representatives and Senators to work for change.
In 1988 I went on a road trip with my parents, husband, and then two -year-old daughter. My Dad was a big Civil War and also Harry Truman fan. Since we lived on the border of Missouri and Kansas, he had sites he wanted to see.
We drove down Hwy 69 to Ft. Scott first to see the old historic site. It was in the beginning of its renovations and restorations. I just remember one building. From there we went to Silver Dollar City, Mansfield where we visited Laura Ingalls Wilder’s house (for my Mom and me) and finally on our way home, we stopped in Lamar, Missouri, to see Truman’s birthplace. This four-day trip was a highlight for my parents.
For me, there was just one place I wanted to return to, Ft. Scott. For the last 33 years, I have been commenting that I need to go back and see what they did with the fort. It is not that I haven’t been to the city of Fort Scott. I have driven through it at least once a year on my way to Arkansas or other spots in Kansas.
I have even stopped in Ft. Scott to visit the Lowell Milken Center, Unsung Hero Museum. This museum focuses on taking action to improve the lives of others. I was interested in it through my volunteer work with the Kansas City Section of the National Council of Jewish Women. We were involved in the development of the play about Irena Sendler: Life In A Jar, which is highlighted at the museum.
But I never got over to the Fort! Each time I went it was raining, not a gentle rain, but a good Kansas downpour.
When I went the first time, in 1988, the renovations and restorations had only been going on for a decade. The Fort Scott Historic Site became part of the National Park System only in 1978. For a long time, From the late 1800s to 1978, it was part of the town of Ft. Scott. Some of the buildings, that were not torn down, were used by town’s people as homes or community buildings, like a home for girls.
In the 1950s community members started working to restoring the fort. Most buildings are not original, rather recreations. Since 1978, recreations of buildings have been built around the common area.
The Fort was important during the time of “bleeding Kansas,” as Kansas and Missouri fought over free and slave states. In fact, during that time, two of the buildings were used as hotels. Across the square common area from each other, one was for those who supported a free state, the other was for those who wanted a slave state. Sometimes, violence broke out!!
During the Civil War, the Fort was used as a supply depot and hospital for Union soldiers. In the Visitors’ Center they have a room set up as the hospital would have been like in the 1860s.
For the past 33 years, I have been wondering, did it get completed? What happened? I have been wanting to see the Fort! I tried to arrange field trips with friends to take our children there. It never happened. I tried to get my husband to go with me. He did not have time to take the drive.
Finally, I completed my quest. In the time of Covid, my husband had 25 vacation days that have to be used before July 1. He is taking every Thursday and Friday off for three months. Good friends of ours drove down from Wisconsin. Our first overnight company in 15 months. We are all vaccinated. I suggested a field trip to Ft. Scott. Most of the time we would be outside. They agreed.
I have to admit, it was better than I imagined. When we were there 33 years ago, the place was ragtag and a mess of construction. Now it is a lovely well-organized group of 20 buildings that you can enter and see cannons and carriages; the places where supplies were kept and bread was made. The best was the officers’ quarters. The building we entered was an original 1845 building. It is the same building we went into in 1988. This building had been a private home and then a school for girls.
There is even a Tallgrass Prairie planted with a trail, so that you can imagine yourself walking the prairies of Kansas in the 1840s.
We spent about 90 minutes walking around the grounds and into the open buildings. Several of the buildings were closed for various reasons. The Visitors’ Center, which once was the hospital, has a small gift shop, and clean restroom. There is no entrance fee to visit the historic site. It is opened almost every day until 5 pm. But even when the buildings are closed, you are still allowed to walk around the park.
After we toured the site, we walked across the street to a nice little Mexican restaurant and then walked through the quaint town, entering a few stores.
There is one other museum I want to see in Ft. Scott, the Gordon Parks Museum. Located on the grounds of the Ft. Scout Community College, the museum highlights the work and life of well-known photographer Gordon Parks. I will get there one day!
To be honest, I enjoyed my day in Ft. Scott so much, I have decided that this one-hour drive will be added to my activities whenever we have out of town company. It is a great way to spend a day.
Center of the common area. Across the way are the soldiers quarters and the stable.
The officers’ quarters. The building on the right, known as the Wilson/Goodlander Home.This is the building I saw in 1988.
The back of the officers’ quarters. They had private gardens.
Inside the hospital.
The bakery.
The basement of the storehouse. The stone floor is the original floor.
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