The Four Levels of Intimacy

In my previous post I talked about five types of intimacy and the circle of support. Now let’s talk about some examples of the levels of intimacy. They go along well with the four circles in the circle of support (exchange, participation, friendship, and intimacy).

Mental Intimacy:

1) Talk about general information.

2) Share your own thoughts and ideas about general topics.

3) Share your dreams, aspirations, and thoughts on more important topics.

4) Create thoughts, dreams, and ideas together.

Spiritual Intimacy:

1) Talk about more generalized spiritual things.

2) Share your thoughts and feelings about spiritual things.

3) Share more sacred, personal experiences.

4) Feel spiritually linked.

Emotional Intimacy:

1) Talk about general emotions and things you like/dislike.

2) Share your feelings (happy, sad, etc).

3) Share more private, inner feelings about more challenging topic.s

4) Create emotional commitment and bonding.

Physical Intimacy:

1) Stand or sit near another person.

2) Interactive touching like light touching during sports or activities.

3) Embracing or hugging.

4) Kissing, making out, petting, having sex with a romantic partner.

Teaching your teen about the types and levels of intimacy will help them navigate the confusing relationships they are entering. The teen years are a time of massive changes and teens need help navigating all of the social nuances. Discuss how these levels show up both in face-to-face interactions and online because they will feel different to your teen!