Hal Walling
Hal is General Manager at Campfire Labs, a boutique content marketing agency that specializes in longform storytelling for brands like Dropbox, Asana, Notion, and others. He lives on Vancouver Island with his wife Chassandre and their two kids (1 and 3 years old).
What does your normal working day look like?
I’m up with the kids at 6 and at my desk by 7:30. Chassandre works 9 to 5, so she does daycare dropoff, and I leave to pick up our daughter around 3:30. Then it’s back home to make dinner and relieve our son’s nanny, who’s in the house from 8:30 to 4:30. We try to always eat as a family, a tradition that comes from Chassandre’s upbringing, and which I’ve learned to appreciate as someone who never had that ritual growing up. The kids’ bedtime is 6:30, after which I often have a bit of work to finish since my end-of-day is always such a scramble.
How long have you had this routine?
Since last summer when we moved to Vancouver Island. In Toronto, our daughter’s daycare was open 7:30 to 5:30, which gave Chassandre and I a lot more flexibility when trying to fit in each of our workdays. The daycare here is only open from 8 to 4, so it’s a major balancing act that requires staggering our workdays, coordinating with our son’s nanny, etc.
How has it changed as your children have gotten older or as your family has grown?
Our kids are 1 and 3, so it’s always changing. Whether it’s working with a newborn at home, hiring a nanny, returning to work, changing nap schedules, changing daycares, or just the constant barrage of sickness, everything is an adjustment. I don’t ever feel settled. The next big changes will be when our son goes to daycare (as soon as we can get a spot) and when our daughter starts kindergarten.
What boundaries have you set around your work and how did you work with your colleagues to enable them?
I have a lot of responsibilities at work, but my coworkers are all wonderful and extremely accommodating when it comes to my duties as a parent. If one of the kids gets sick, I rarely have to ask to reschedule meetings, because my team is already on top of it. I’m extremely lucky as a parent to work in this type of environment.
What systems do you have in place to have a successful day?
The most important is probably just Chassandre and I having clear expectations of when we each begin and end work. She knows I need to start by 7:30 in order to put in a full day, and I know she needs to work until 5 to do the same.
The same goes for respecting each other’s boundaries when one of us is working and the other is home with the kids. We’re both fortunate to work from home and have four-day workweeks (Mon-Thurs for me, Tues-Fri for her) but that also means we have to make a concerted effort to not ask for too much help when one of us is with the kids and the other is working.
What productivity tools/processes do you use in your work?
I religiously use the Apple Reminders app to keep track of big and small tasks. If I have a few easy to-dos, I’ll try to knock them out at the same time. I’ll also block out time on my calendar to complete larger or more complex tasks.
Switching to weekends, what are the most important things to get right to have an excellent weekend day?
We try to find a balance between doing things together as a family, and giving the other parent time to unwind. The former might mean going to the beach, going to the pool, going skating, getting together with friends. The latter might mean sleeping in, going for a run, making space for a personal project.
How do you "turn off work" and give the kids your full attention?
For me, the most important thing is putting my phone and laptop far away. Sometimes I can’t help myself, and I start checking my email or Slack in front of the kids. They’re getting old enough that I can see them register the distance that shows up between us when I’m on my phone. That’s a horrible feeling, but it is a good reminder to put away my phone.
What have been the most impactful things that you've automated or outsourced in your family?
Can I say childcare? Between Toronto and Vancouver Island, we’ve had two great daycares for our daughter and two amazing nannies for our son. Days when we don’t have this support—the daycare is closed, our nanny is sick or on vacation—are usually a mess.
What principles have served you best in your parenting?
This is nearly impossible to do all the time, but I try to treat my kids with the same level of empathy, calm, kindness, and respect I would any other person. Two lessons my mom drilled into me growing up were “be flexible” and “don’t judge people.” I try to practice these qualities as a parent, and I hope to pass them down to my kids as well.
How do you handle hard behaviour e.g. tantrums?
I try to remind myself that kids have big feelings, and that exhibiting them is an important part of their development. My daughter is three and a half; when she’s having a tantrum, I try to give her space and, once she’s calmed down, ask her why she’s upset. Usually her answer is “I don’t know.” If she won’t calm down, I read somewhere that you can try to work with the child’s momentum, pick up on anything that seems to be bringing them out of the tantrum, and kind of use that momentum to gradually steer them toward a resolution.
Is there a primary parent in your household or do you split the parenting evenly?
We’re very even, about 50-50 in how we split parenting duties overall. There are things one or the other is better at, and some duties we’ve just claimed because we enjoy it (e.g. I make breakfast, Chassandre does baths), but it works out to about the same.
How do you divide the work and make sure that it is fair?
We’re both so busy between work and parenting, it happens more or less organically. There’s no time for anything else. If one of us isn’t working, we’re usually parenting, and vice versa. Anything that’s not parenting or work is something we’ve had to consciously allot time for, which requires the other parent’s support.
How do you bring play and fun into your time with your children?
This is a recent thing I'm trying, but I’ve made a concerted effort to say “yes” when they ask me to do something with them—dance, read a book, sing a song, play one of their weird games. Sometimes I’m tired, and their games can be exceptionally boring, but I think it’s important to have fun on their terms.
What piece of advice do you give to all new parents? What advice should they ignore?
Around the time we were expecting our daughter, someone told me, “There are two lives: the one before you become a parent, and the one after.” That feels true to me. Our kids have brought so much chaos and joy into our lives. Raising them can be deeply challenging, but there is nothing more rewarding than spending time with them and watching them grow.
I try not to give unsolicited advice, but what I would tell any new parent is that your perspective on the world is about to change forever. Your life will have meaning in a way it never did before. Embrace the change, enjoy it, because there’s no going back.